No pressure...

Driving down the road after leaving his basketball game...

E: "Mom? Are you ever going to get married?"
Me: "I'm not sure. Maybe one day."
E: "Have you thought about getting married before?"
Me: "Of course."
E: "Have you really tried to find someone to marry?"
Me: "I've gone on dates and I've met different people. I just haven't found anyone that I want to marry."
E: "Because it's not like you're ugly."
Me: "Well, thanks."
E: "So you could find someone to marry you."
Me: "I'm sure I could find someone that would marry me, honey. I just haven't found anyone that *I* want to marry."
E: "Have you tried those online places? They always seem to work really well."
Me: "Is that what you heard on the commercial?"
E: "Yes. What kind of qualities are you looking for in a husband?"
Me: "Well, he has to be kind, smart, funny, handsome...and he has to love both of us!"
E: "That's a lot of qualities. Might be kind of hard to find someone that has all of those things."
Me: "I'm ok being single, then."

.....

Me: "Do you want me to get married?"
E: "There would be good and bad things if you got married."
Me: "Oh, yeah? What kind of good stuff?"
E: "Well, it would be good to have someone to throw a ball with."
Me: "I throw a ball with you."
E: "It's not the same."
Me: "I have a good arm!"
E: "The best arm I'm ever seen on a girl. But a guy would have a different kind of arm."
Me: "You want me to get married just so you can throw a ball with a guy?"
E: "And so I can get an Xbox. Most grown-up guys have an Xbox."