No pressure...

Driving down the road after leaving his basketball game...

E: "Mom? Are you ever going to get married?"
Me: "I'm not sure. Maybe one day."
E: "Have you thought about getting married before?"
Me: "Of course."
E: "Have you really tried to find someone to marry?"
Me: "I've gone on dates and I've met different people. I just haven't found anyone that I want to marry."
E: "Because it's not like you're ugly."
Me: "Well, thanks."
E: "So you could find someone to marry you."
Me: "I'm sure I could find someone that would marry me, honey. I just haven't found anyone that *I* want to marry."
E: "Have you tried those online places? They always seem to work really well."
Me: "Is that what you heard on the commercial?"
E: "Yes. What kind of qualities are you looking for in a husband?"
Me: "Well, he has to be kind, smart, funny, handsome...and he has to love both of us!"
E: "That's a lot of qualities. Might be kind of hard to find someone that has all of those things."
Me: "I'm ok being single, then."

.....

Me: "Do you want me to get married?"
E: "There would be good and bad things if you got married."
Me: "Oh, yeah? What kind of good stuff?"
E: "Well, it would be good to have someone to throw a ball with."
Me: "I throw a ball with you."
E: "It's not the same."
Me: "I have a good arm!"
E: "The best arm I'm ever seen on a girl. But a guy would have a different kind of arm."
Me: "You want me to get married just so you can throw a ball with a guy?"
E: "And so I can get an Xbox. Most grown-up guys have an Xbox."

Raising a boy...

I love being the mother of a boy. Long before I was pregnant with E, I knew I wanted to be the mother of a boy. A few of my friends are expecting boys for the first time, and we've been laughing about the differences between boys and girls. While I lack experience with little girls aside from tea parties and princess dresses, after almost 10 years of living in isolated captivity with a little boy, I consider myself a subject matter expert.

When talking with my friend, I mentioned that E leaves a trail of chaos in his wake. She laughed and said that her daughter is messy, too, and I replied that E isn't messy....he's chaotic. It was hard to put into words, but there's a difference.

Your trash can always looks like this:

 

 

The top of their dresser is layered with clothes, hats, masks, and play dough mats.

 

 

 

His bathroom looks like this 24 hours after being cleaned.

 

 

 

Legos are everywhere. Everywhere.

 

 

 

Your couch looks like this after he's watched a cartoon.

 

 

 

Underwear is twirled on the foot and left where it lands.

 

 

 

The secret to a long, healthy life sounds like this.

 





Super old things from the nineteen hundreds...

E: "Guess what?!"
Me: "What?"
E: "I found a quarter on the playground today!"
Me: "That's awesome!"
E: "It was just laying there! A quarter!"
Me: "You have a good eye!"
E: "Yep. I was pretty impressed with myself. I put it in my pocket to make sure I wouldn't lose it."
Me: "Have you put it in your bank yet?"
E: "Nope. I don't have it anymore."
Me: "What happened?"
E: "I traded it for a penny that my friend found."
Me: "You traded a quarter for a penny?"
E: "Yeah. It was from, like, 1992, so super old. I thought it might be worth something."
Me: "1992 wasn't that long ago, bubs. I think it's still only worth a penny."
E: "Something from the NINETEEN HUNDREDS is only worth a penny? But it's crazy old!"
Me: "Dude. I'm from the nineteen hundreds."
E: "Right..."
Me: "Whatevs. I'm going to start making dinner soon."